Dec 31, 2010

Ninja's New Year's Resolution

As any respectable ninja, I take care of my body. I practice meditation, yoga and Aikido. That is... I used to! When I lived in Pacific Grove with my dog Sensei Master 's they gave me plenty of aerobic exercise to do. (Mostly they chased me.) I was a finely honed specimen of feline sinew and muscle, as I am sure you can tell by looking at my photo. I was in prime condition. RIght?


But, things changed! When I first arrived, there was only Jeffery. He was quite an elderly gentleman cat, a forester, and had incredible tales of life in the wild. Certainly believable by the state of his missing teeth and scrawny appearance. Though not a martial artist like myself, he could throw a resounding sneaky punch that left me airless! Being a gentlemancat, I did not retaliate.

I understood right away when introduced to Jeffery that he was depressed and had not been eating. No wonder he was so skinny!  So when I came along, suddenly Jeffery's appetite was back. There's nothing like a good competition between mancats, you know! Mama-san was feeding him a lot of food, as much as he could eat, so he would gain weight. And naturally, without my dog Sensei Master's to discipline me in my ninja exercise program, I became lazy, I mean... more meditative, that is.  Since Jeffery was generous, I ate freely at his bowl, and have admittedly the sinew has become saggy, the muscles have become muffled, the finely honed has become hunky-chunky. Well, again, I'm sure you can tell just by looking at my photo.


So today, in front of the whole world, this most humble Ninja will do the most inscrutable correct thing. I have now made my New Year Resolution to shape up!

Dec 29, 2010

Welcome Home Baby Sister

I was in da front window on guard and watching. When they got here, I was already to greet, but dey was carrying big things and being noisy so I slithered off to the laundry room to wait and see.



Mommy came in and saw me. I was mad at her and wouldn't let her love on me cos she took my little baby sister away. Next thing I know she puts me into the spare room! How do you like that? Then she put Ninja and Bambi in there wif me. We was shocked. That no way to greet us! So we lay down while they go in and out of house unloading car.



After a while, I listen at door and still I hear them bringing stuff inside from da car. I think ta myself it a good idea to be inside spare room ta keep us safe. She don't want us ta run away. Just before Mommy left the other day, we all went outside. We couldn't help it! Ninja pried open da door. And you know how tempting that is. Oh but we were so naughty to do that! We even went out past the Gazebo. So, no wonder Mommy put us in the spare room. I so sorry we do that cos then we has to have our paws all washed off of muddy stuff.



After Mom and X and The Lady brought in all the stuff, then let us out of the room and there was my little Sista coming outta her pink carrier! Oh boy, I was so happy ta see her! I loves her so much! I so glad she home now. I gonna let her beat me up as much as her wants!

Dec 28, 2010

Cats Home Alone!

Leaving us home alone to fend for ourselves, some would say is unconscionable. But, we were not entirely alone as Neighbor Girl and the Monk came to visit for a while each day.


Yes, that meant we didn't get to see Mom, but that was fine with me as she had taken my new little princess with her, the one that Spyder is calling Sissy. I have not deigned to give her a proper name, yet. Unkind of me? No, it must be a carefully thought out process.


I was able to get in some valuable beauty sleep and escape the ravages and energy of my little princess. Bless her young innocent heart. I miss her while she is away with Mom, but truly she is a paw full. Even with my faithful minion, Ninja and loyal young boycat, Spyder, to give her attention, it can be exhausting to play chase with her all day. I'm sure you know what I mean if you have ever had a young kitten in your home.


I have some wonderful pictures that my dear liege, Ninja, has taken of me in my various stages of repose. I'm sure you can see how well rested this royal purrsonage looks. The first is on Mom's pillow while she is away. The second is under the lamp. I stay there when it automatically illuminates. And, of course, when The Monk is here, I've got the best place in the house! He looks so happy to love me. Doesn't he?

Cats Left Alone!!!

It's so frustrating being without the computer. Don't you think so? Mama-San left a few days ago and took it with her, much to our dismay! And if we hadn't seen it with our own eyes we might have thought Little Sister had been kitnapped!!!

They went to see the relatives down south far away and left us behind.


Neighbor Girl came over the first day to console us, but Queen Bambi was having none of it. She was worried about her little princess kitten. She just wouldn't come out to say hello, until Neighbor Girl brought in a large bouquet of fresh grown catnip to help her forget her worries. Good thing we have plenty of it in our garden!


Spyder was so lonesome for Little Sister that Queen Bambi took pity on him and kissed his head. "There, there," she said, "Mom will bring her back soon! Don't cry." She offered him some of her catnip but he was not interested in it at all. He is one of those cats who don't have a taste for it. They say it is genetic. I guess I am going to have to work with that boy! Just the same, all the more for me and Bambi.



The next day the Monk came to hang out with us. He gave treats to us all and fed the fish in the aquarium. Bambi and Spyder really enjoy helping with the fish, and sampling the water a bit, too.


I always help myself to catnip whenever it is offered, but don't go Lady Ga Ga over it the way Bambi does. I enjoy watching the fish, but as a proper Ninja, I do not overindulge. Besides, fish live in a VERY wet world!!! In a way, I think it was a very good thing that Mama-San went away. After all, that gave me constant access to the feeders, and I consoled myself there often. And when the Monk came over to take care of us, he gave me extra special attention because he loves me best!

There! I've said it! He loves me best!

Dec 22, 2010

New Little Sis Pix

 Hey... it's Ninja Cat here. I've got pix of our new little girl for you. She is such a smart little kitten. She just watches one of us for a few times and before you know it, she accomplishes what it took forever for us to learn. Here she is up on top of the book case. Spyder dared her to climb and she did. He didn't think she would because he's grown big enough to hog the shelf. But, she just climbed right over him.


You might have noticed that I don't call her Sissy. That's because she is no sissy girl. I think she knows that too. She doesn't pay any attention to Mama-San when she calls her Sissy. Well, just look at how she didn't hesitate to leave Spyder behind and leaped up to the closet shelf.


Our intrepid thumbed baby had a goal. She had seen our Queen, Bambi enter the closet and hide out in her cube. Mama-San has it safely attached to the shelf so it wont fall over. You can only see Bambi's royal backside as she realizes our little "Sista", (as Spyder calls her sometimes), investigates Bambi's sacred space.


 Mama-San took lots of pictures of their encounter, but they were poking at each other so quickly that those pix are only a blur. It wasn't until our Royal Highness left her cube so Sissy could move in, before things calmed down. Bambi just can't believe she was ousted by her little princess.


Little Thumb Girl investigates the cube. Notice that thumb. Will you? She's an amazing princess kitten. Don't you think? Maybe she should be named Polly, because she is a polydactyl cat. And just to let you know she hasn't fully taken over Queen Bambi's cube. We are all taking turns now thanks to the princess taking over. Thank you little girl!

Dec 14, 2010

Dec 12, 2010

Royal Cat Decree from Queen Bambi


I hereby proclaime that whether the Queen is sick or not, she shall not be hunted down like a common criminal and be forced to have that nasty, disgusting medicine put down her delicate throat!!! (Cough! Cough!)

Those who endeavor to disobey this law, shall be terrorized, and threatened by this hissed off cat! And shall be avoided like the plague from which you should suffer! (Oh, where are those dead rats when I need them?)

Be prepared to face my wrath! (sneeze... cough... sniffle... mew?)

No, No No! You can't catch me! I wont have it. You understand me? I wont have it!!! I will hide and sneak away faster than you can imagine.

Hunt me down, will you? I'm smarter than any purrson. Do you think for one minute I cannot outsmart you? Puny hooman! (Ah-Choo!!!)

Even if I am coughing so loud I can't hear myself think, I know you are trying to sneak up on me so you can give me that putris.

Think you for an instant that I cannot read your mind?

This is no way to treat your Queen!!! Where is your respect and reverence for me?

No matter how high I am hiding, I will get away from you long before you get that ladder out and try to climb up to me! (Cough! Choke! Gag!)

No matter what low you crawl on your hands and knees to shimmy your hulk under the bed, I am laughing at you all the way up over your back, and down your legs leaving my scratch tracks behind me.

Don't you realize yet, that you wont win? Must I bite you to prove my point? (Growwwwl! Hissssss!!!)

If I felt better I would claw my way through that cat proof window screen and run away from home! 

And don't you think for one second that you are going to lure me into that cozy travel carrier again!

I shall not permit you to take me to that so-called Better-inarian! He doesn't make me feel better one iota!!!

In fact, if you will remember correctly, he assaulted me with his thermometer and you stood right there holding me down and helped him!

You are a partner in the crimes against the Crown! You are nothing but a low down Traitor! (Meooooow!!!!)

Have you never heard of Patient's Rights? HOW DARE YOU!!! (Sigh! Cough! Cough!)

Please pet me?

Dec 11, 2010

Ninja and the Tasmanian Devil Kitten

Hi, Ninja here... We've had entirely too much going on around here. First Miss E brings home a kitten, then we find out the kitten is sick, then Spyder got sick, then our Queen, Bambi got sick. I don't believe I'll get sick. I will use my Ninja powers to keep well.

It's too bad I couldn't teach Spyder those methods, but he just doesn't pay attention. You know how it is when a cat is going through his teen age times. Right?

I was quite disgusted when Miss E brought that kitten home. I knew she was in that bathroom even though she never made a peep. I could hear her breathing, and of course, her kitten scent permeated my well trained ninja nose.

I decided to not be friends with the kit, but it has become unavoidable.

Even though I tell her in no uncertain terms, she totally ignores my growls, and insists on playing with my tail! I have to leave the room and everyone laughs at me, calling me a wuss, afraid of a kitten. Of course, it's not true. A ninja must maintain his honor!

Personally, I think I might be able to take her on as a willing apprentice. The only thing is, the kit is all thumbs! I kid you not. She's got thumbs!

Though her colors are not ninja colors. Her calico, tortie colors would give good camouflage. It might take a while to teach her how to control her Chi as she is all over the place. Good thing she has the three of us to chase and play with.

She is like a Tasmanian Devil! She never settles down!

And when she does, she thinks nothing of sleeping in our own personal spaces, even though she has her own special place. She sleeps there too. Plus, she evens sleeps on top of Miss E!

Sissy keeps referring to Miss E as Mommy. I guess the kit doesn't know any better. But, she gets confused when we say Miss E. So we have decided for all of us to call her Mommy.

I'm not going to be comfortable with it. After all, I'm too old for that! I think it would be more respectful if I call her Mama-san.

Once Spyder, and Bambi all get well, I think life around here is going to be quite a bit more interesting from now on!

Dec 9, 2010

A Royal Proclamation from Queen Bambi

It is I, Queen Bambi, here to announce the addition to our population the young Princess Angelica. I am permitting her to be a Princess because she can never become a Queen and dethrone me. I made sure she was worthy of the position by ignoring her totally when she arrived and watched her carefully from my closet boudoir. I must admit she has a privileged aura about her that will befit her royal station.

She is a pretty thing, I assure you, a calico-tortie I believe. Makes me think of the Dowager Queen, for whom this blog is named. (as already noted by our friends, Milo and Alfie) Our little miss was named Angelica by the shelter from whence she came, but we wont be addressing her thus. She is a cute young thing and I have cast my vote to re-name her Angel. But, Spyder insists on calling her "Sista", and now Miss E has picked up on calling her Sissy.

Now as long as we are changing names around here, we are acquiescing to little Sissy's name for Miss E which is Mommy. I'm a bit uncomfortable with it myself. So unbeffitting one of my rank. Don't you think? But, for the sake of our little girl, I will refer to Mommy so as not to confuse her.

Sissy isn't afraid of anything. She's a little Tasmanian Devil, and a whirlwind around the house. She's quick as a flash from one room to the other. The more her energy increased, the less Spyder's did. After he took ill, I came out to place with the little girl. After all she needed someone to play with.

All Ninja could do was growl at her. She took it like a trooper and shrugged her little shoulders at him. She keeps a respectful attitude, but I see she is bringing Ninja out of his shell and he actually was sleeping on the bed near to her this evening! I was greatly relieved. Now, Perhaps Ninja can take on some of the kitten sitting responsibility around here. I am certainly feeling under the weather and devoid of patience with Sissy right now. She has completely taken over my closet boudoir! Who knew one so tiny could leap up to the closet shelf like that. She watched me do it one time, only, and next thing you know she was in there playing with the ribbons. You see what I mean about her being a Tasmanian Devil? Feisty thing! Oh this is going to be interesting to see how she will liven up the boys!

As queen, I must not let my subjects know I am tired and cold and sneezing. Except for my brief sojourn at the keyboard I have taken to hiding beneath the blankets pushed up to Miss E's warm plumply thigh. (correction: Mommy)

Dec 8, 2010

Baby Sister and Sick Kitty

My little baby sista has a name sombuddy gave her at the shelter. Miss E asked me what's her name, but I know her means da name us kitty's is gonna call her. Since her shelther name is Angelica, we might let her keep it, since her is a angel baby. But, I likes ta call her Sista! Maybe Sister Angelica? Or Sissy?

Speakin' of names. Sissy keeps calling Miss E, Mommy. We tol her it's Miss E, but she still calls her Mommy, so me and Ninja and Queen Bambi is tryin' not to confuse Sissy, so we let's her say Mommy, cause she so happy when Mommy pik her ups, her purrs like a machine. So she can calls her Mommy if'n she wants to!

My little Sista, we think she gots a cold. Her keeps on sneezing. Miss E, I mean Mommy called da Shelter and they sed take her to da Vet free. Mommy did that and her tooks me too, cuz I was coffin.

Da nex day, I was coffin more and I dint want ta play wif Sissy no more. She wore me out. I went to hide unnerneath da sofa. Mommy and da Monk couldn't find me until they tipped the sofa upside down. I was jus so tired I dint want ta come out. Good thing they gots me out. I got so sicky yechhy. I were not eatin nothin and den I dint want ta drink no water. I lost a whole pound of weight! I is skinny enuff already, so dat not good. No wonder I felt sicks!

Then I has ta go ta da Vet, too. And dis time it weren't free. Da vet said I has Ton-sill-it-is and enfection. Da medicine da Vet gave for Miss E (I mean Mommy) ta give me dint work, and I had ta go back to da Vet. I had xrays and a shot a anti-biotics. Then dey had ta put water in a tube and put it into my skin at da back of my neck. I really dint like dat at all! Dat costed a whole lot more money. But, I is worth it!

Now I is all better!

Dec 7, 2010

Announcing Our New Baby Kitten!!!

I gots ta tell ya, I'm da happy cat! Can yoo guess why? Nope? Cuz I gots a baby sista!

Dat's right!

Miss E camed home wif a baby sista for me. Well, and for Bambi and Ninja, too. Though, they don't seems ta be as happy 'bout it as me.

I knowed sumpin was up when Miss E came home dat day. She comes home lotsa times wif the scents of other cats on her. Dat's cuz she goes to da shelters where we all once stayed to visit dem cats and kittens waitin' for their forever homes. We is use to her havin' dem tell-tale cat hairs stuk to her clothes. But, when she brought home my new little baby sista, we knew dere was sumpin diffrunt goin on.

First she lock us all in one room, den she puttin sump stuff in da baffroom and we hear her setting up a litter box and opening a can of cat food. How could we not figger it out?

Ninja, him jus pretend him don't know nuttin. Queen Bambi be stickin her nose up in da air and go hide in da closet and dont come down for all day, for two days. In da meantime, I is sittin right dere by da door. I can smell my new little baby sista in dere. I can hears her even tho she tryin ta be quiet.

She scared. And she cold. It was a verry cold night. Den Miss E, she lock us all in the spare room again and bring my little baby sista into her bedroom and put her carrier on da bed to keep her warm. I dint mind at all, but Ninja all grumpy and scrape him nunchuk claws at da door.

Nex morning Miss E comes in our room and forgets to close da dorr behine her and Ninja run to kitchen cuz him wants food. Miss E, she tryin' ta get Bambi outs of da closet, so I sneaks into her bedroom, jumps on da bed and sniffs my little baby sista. She not so scared, but she so lonesome. No more she is wif her other friends and she wonder why she alone. I tell her no worry. She gonna like it here.